When I was asked to join the Respect Dare challenge I thought this should be great. I will learn how to respect my husband better and become a better biblical wife. Who knew that the ouch and oops would happen so soon at day 3? I guess I should have expected it, right? I mean the title is Respect Dare. It’s not Respect When It Is Convenient or Respect When I Am Fully Comfortable.
In my head I am a perfect version of Every Woman, Superwoman, head CEO, and Vice President of my well oiled brand I call home but in truth I am a simple woman with weaknesses, faults, and missed opportunities to get it right. Now I don’t say those things as a form of condemnation but out of humility. In the beginning of my marriage I thought that I had to have it all together and thought that I could. I quickly learned that picture of perfection was a myth when it came to real life responsibilities that included 3 children and a husband. I could not be the woman that I thought my mother was who seemed to do things so effortlessly in caring for her 3 girls with the help of her younger sister. I didn’t know that I needed help or could ask for it then but I know today.
Day 3 of the Respect Dare is a reminder of how my imperfection as a wife humbles me to know that I can’t do this marriage thing alone. I need the blessing that God has allowed to find me to help keep me balanced and a circle of strong godly women to hold me accountable. No, every day is not perfect but it is worth the journey along the way.
Respecting your husband is about more than agreeing with him and allowing him to make decisions as the Holy Spirit leads him. It’s about respecting that he is a work in progress just like you. He is not perfect nor will he ever be. He has shortcomings just like you (when you are willing to admit to yours). He has goals and dreams like you but sometimes it takes a while for him to realize them. Be patient. God has him under construction and can do more with his Grace and Mercy Company than we ever could.
I can attest to the fact that when you surrender your will to God and allow Him to work through both you and your husband you can and will see a change. I have to give up the appearance of perfection and do the work that it takes to improve. Even after 14 years of marriage I am still a work in progress. As I stated in the beginning I did have to say ouch and oops to the some of the things that I have read and learned in the Respect Dare, so far. It’s uncomfortable but it’s nothing that I can’t handle (with God’s grace of course).
As I continue with the remainder of this 40 day challenge I pray that God reveals more about my role as a wife that shows respect unconditionally to my husband as I expect him to unconditionally love me. I pray that as God shows me insights about my own shortcomings and the transformation that occurs that my transparency will help you to find the patience you need to do the same. Finally I pray that you would join me on this journey and share your insights with others. You never know who may need to know that they are not alone in their challenges and victory is possible.
I dare you to be willing to take an honest look at your imperfections in the raw and keep coming back so we can grow together. Let’s go.
If you would like to learn more about the dare connect with the author at http://www.ninaroesner.com
Fighting for Marriage 
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